20 shades of Me.
I suck, I admit it. I allow time to pass me by, saving everything for tomorrow. It's because I wanted a blog piece that filled in the blanks a little about who I was. I've always struggled with how to 'introduce' myself. It's over due and been on my 'to do' list for longer than I'd like to admit. Summing yourself up into paragraph or two is extremely daunting. I start to question everything about myself... like "do I really love chocolate THAT much" and so begins the anxious spiral of "who am I?" and "what have I REALLY accomplished in my life?" I'm the same in 'real life'. I was recently at a work conference and as we went around the circle doing the incredibly awkward 'ice breakers' the question came around "Tell us something interesting about yourself?" Everyone had answers like "gold medalist at the winter olympics"(I wish I was exaggerating) "irrational fear of apple stickers" "conquered the Kokoda trail" and all I could think was...."I have two children" Thats how interesting I am... I can reproduce... WOO HOO!! How interestingly unique that is! I ended up coming through with the goods in the end and thought of something interesting enough, but those 20 minutes of listening to all these successful people's impressive stories, definitely made me question mine. So without further ado, after many failed attempts. I am totally cheating and have grabbed some questions off trusty ol' google. And well here goes...
1. What’s your life motto, or philosophy you live by?
Love is all. When you strip everything back, forget all the bullshit and really think about it, It all comes down to love. I actually got it tattooed on my back around 5 years ago. My grandfathers lung cancer was making it's second comeback when I received a text message from my mum. It said how she couldn't bare to tell me herself; that surgery was scheduled to remove a small 'mass' from her breast. We packed everything up, put our 2 toddler's in the car and drove 17 hrs home to see her. We were very lucky they had caught it early and surgery was the only required treatment. It seems fate was guiding me and I ended up moving home as my grandfather's cancer had became terminal. At this time my Uncle was also diagnosed with an aggressive terminal cancer. I feel very blessed to have helped care for them in their dying days. Pieces of my heart forever missing.
My heart. I genuinely care about everyone. I am at my happiest doing things for those that I love. My heart literally swells when I know I am helping people. Its been a journey, but I've learnt the hard way that not everyone has the same capacity of love in their heart.
3. Do you follow a religion or spiritual practice?
Law of attraction, Fate and Karma. I am a firm believer that you reap what you sow.
4. What was the best time of your life?
I feel like I'm in my best years now. I actually get anxiety when I think about us getting older, the kids leaving home etc.
5. What was the worst thing that ever happened to you?
My brother dying of SIDs when he was only four months old. I was six at the time and remember everything about that day. I think it will haunt me forever.
6. What’s your biggest dream?
Our girls finding their passions and chasing their dreams. Getting to a place where we have complete financial freedom.
7. What did you want to be when you were a kid?
An actress and/or dancer. I lived and breathed performing and thought I was destined to be on stage.
8. What was/is your biggest accomplishment?
Besides our girls. I would say our marriage. We beat the odds. From 19, pregnant and living week to week to almost 30, happy, successful and ticking off our bucket list.I never thought we'd actually get to where we are today.
9. Why do you think we’re all here?
I joke that we are some aliens science experiment. I do think we all have a purpose. I believe that the key to a peaceful and happy existence is here. We just have to realise it and work together instead of against each other.
10. What was your best relationship?
Without sounding like a hallmark card... My husband, he's shown me a love and depth of care that I never new existed
11. If you could change one thing about the world, what would it be?
How we treat each other. We have got our selves into this self entitled existence where we honestly believe our own opinion/view/path is the only one of value. What happened to "live and let live"
12. Do you like your job? If not, what would you like to do instead?
I love my job. I'm good at what I do and I work hard for the business. I'm also lucky enough to work with some of my favourite people. Is it my dream job? No. I either want to own my own business which gives me creative freedom, or teach pre school. I just seem to bond so easily with children, their innocence is inspiring... but I'm not there just yet. We have a 5 year plan.
13. What are your favorite hobbies?
Anything that engages my creative side.
14. If money was no object, what would you do in life?
Live abroad for a year. Enrol in a make up course. Possibly create a tiny human? Book a family trip to Hawaii... Who knows.
15. Have you ever broken someone’s heart?
Yes.
16. What are you thankful for?
Beautiful healthy daughters with genuine hearts, an adoring supportive husband and employment that give's us the financial security and freedom we desire.
17. What do you wish people understood more about you?
I am an open and honest book. Unfortunately being an open book, I am open to interpretation. I have been told I'm intimidating more than once, which I find confusing as I feel like I'm a warm and friendly person but who knows.
18. If you could turn back time and do anything differently, would you?
I don't think I could change anything... Without sounding cliche, it's all brought me to where I am today. I learnt a lot of lessons last year. I'm SO grateful for the knowledge I gained from it.
19. What’s the craziest, or most exciting thing you’ve ever done?
Eloped. Everyone was against my husband and I getting married so young (20). So we literally ran away and got married. Only our parents and best friends knew. We had like 10 people at our wedding.
20. What do you think about most often?
The future. I always want to ensure we are on the right path for our family. I have a very big fear of accidentally screwing up our children. Mental health seems so fragile these days. I just don't want fuck them up.
I hope you enjoyed these questions and learnt a bit about the person I am. I hope you read it with an open mind and understand how daunting it can be putting yourself out there for the world to judge. I'm sure the more I write the more natural it will feel to just let 'me' flow out and into my words. Peace Out xx
1. What’s your life motto, or philosophy you live by?
Love is all. When you strip everything back, forget all the bullshit and really think about it, It all comes down to love. I actually got it tattooed on my back around 5 years ago. My grandfathers lung cancer was making it's second comeback when I received a text message from my mum. It said how she couldn't bare to tell me herself; that surgery was scheduled to remove a small 'mass' from her breast. We packed everything up, put our 2 toddler's in the car and drove 17 hrs home to see her. We were very lucky they had caught it early and surgery was the only required treatment. It seems fate was guiding me and I ended up moving home as my grandfather's cancer had became terminal. At this time my Uncle was also diagnosed with an aggressive terminal cancer. I feel very blessed to have helped care for them in their dying days. Pieces of my heart forever missing.
My tattoo
2. What’s your favourite thing about yourself?My heart. I genuinely care about everyone. I am at my happiest doing things for those that I love. My heart literally swells when I know I am helping people. Its been a journey, but I've learnt the hard way that not everyone has the same capacity of love in their heart.
3. Do you follow a religion or spiritual practice?
Law of attraction, Fate and Karma. I am a firm believer that you reap what you sow.
4. What was the best time of your life?
I feel like I'm in my best years now. I actually get anxiety when I think about us getting older, the kids leaving home etc.
5. What was the worst thing that ever happened to you?
My brother dying of SIDs when he was only four months old. I was six at the time and remember everything about that day. I think it will haunt me forever.
6. What’s your biggest dream?
Our girls finding their passions and chasing their dreams. Getting to a place where we have complete financial freedom.
7. What did you want to be when you were a kid?
An actress and/or dancer. I lived and breathed performing and thought I was destined to be on stage.
8. What was/is your biggest accomplishment?
Besides our girls. I would say our marriage. We beat the odds. From 19, pregnant and living week to week to almost 30, happy, successful and ticking off our bucket list.I never thought we'd actually get to where we are today.
I joke that we are some aliens science experiment. I do think we all have a purpose. I believe that the key to a peaceful and happy existence is here. We just have to realise it and work together instead of against each other.
10. What was your best relationship?
Without sounding like a hallmark card... My husband, he's shown me a love and depth of care that I never new existed
11. If you could change one thing about the world, what would it be?
How we treat each other. We have got our selves into this self entitled existence where we honestly believe our own opinion/view/path is the only one of value. What happened to "live and let live"
12. Do you like your job? If not, what would you like to do instead?
I love my job. I'm good at what I do and I work hard for the business. I'm also lucky enough to work with some of my favourite people. Is it my dream job? No. I either want to own my own business which gives me creative freedom, or teach pre school. I just seem to bond so easily with children, their innocence is inspiring... but I'm not there just yet. We have a 5 year plan.
13. What are your favorite hobbies?
Anything that engages my creative side.
Live abroad for a year. Enrol in a make up course. Possibly create a tiny human? Book a family trip to Hawaii... Who knows.
15. Have you ever broken someone’s heart?
Yes.
16. What are you thankful for?
Beautiful healthy daughters with genuine hearts, an adoring supportive husband and employment that give's us the financial security and freedom we desire.
17. What do you wish people understood more about you?
I am an open and honest book. Unfortunately being an open book, I am open to interpretation. I have been told I'm intimidating more than once, which I find confusing as I feel like I'm a warm and friendly person but who knows.
18. If you could turn back time and do anything differently, would you?
I don't think I could change anything... Without sounding cliche, it's all brought me to where I am today. I learnt a lot of lessons last year. I'm SO grateful for the knowledge I gained from it.
19. What’s the craziest, or most exciting thing you’ve ever done?
Eloped. Everyone was against my husband and I getting married so young (20). So we literally ran away and got married. Only our parents and best friends knew. We had like 10 people at our wedding.
This is my favourite wedding photo, we were just taking a moment to say "I can't believe we did it"
(got married) and we were lucky enough our photographer caught it!
20. What do you think about most often?
The future. I always want to ensure we are on the right path for our family. I have a very big fear of accidentally screwing up our children. Mental health seems so fragile these days. I just don't want fuck them up.
I hope you enjoyed these questions and learnt a bit about the person I am. I hope you read it with an open mind and understand how daunting it can be putting yourself out there for the world to judge. I'm sure the more I write the more natural it will feel to just let 'me' flow out and into my words. Peace Out xx
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