Vance's Journey Earth Side
Once again I am in disbelief that I somehow brought another perfect human into the world. I wanted to write the story of Vance's journey earth side whilst it was still somewhat fresh. Any mother will tell you the details quickly fade as our brain tricks us and we are silly enough to go back for more, again... and again... and again? It's a bit of a blur and I don't know where to pin point the start of it all. I'll just start from the days leading up to hopefully answer any questions.
The relief I felt when I had my induction date was over whelming. Not only could we ensure Adam was home, my mum could fly up to watch the girls and my best friend could take photos. The hardest part living so far away from my nearest and dearest is not sharing our special moments with them. Knowing I was going to have my biggest supporters meant the world to me, and we had no idea how badly we would need them. I took my last bump photo, gave our girls the biggest cuddle and kiss knowing next time I saw them our lives would have changed forever. We planned on being home 6 hours after birth so we chucked our light bags in the car and off we went.
Thursday 13th December at 9 am we arrived at the hospital for my induction to begin full of excitement knowing next time I walked through these doors my son would be nestled into my arms. We had been told by my OB previously day one was for getting things going and day two was for having baby. If they were able to break my waters I'd be sent home over night and to come back in the morning. When we arrived we got a shock - I was the only expectant mother about to give birth. I had the attention of all the midwives and the OB, they were keen to get this baby out to "give them something to do". The two sweetest midwives sat with us chatting whilst monitoring began.
Unfortunately they couldn't get to my waters and the first lot of gel was administered. We got settled into our room on the ward and enjoyed some Louis Theroux.
Unfortunately they couldn't get to my waters and the first lot of gel was administered. We got settled into our room on the ward and enjoyed some Louis Theroux.
After 6 hours I had little progress and the second lot of monitoring and gel was administered. This meant I would not be having the baby today. I started getting light contractions - although the midwives weren't sure if it was just gel irritating my uterus I was grateful something was happening. Adam stayed until 9/10 o clock at night, but I sent him home to rest in preparation of the big day tomorrow.
I was due for my next lot of monitoring and to check progression for tomorrow morning. The midwives checked and I STILL had barely progressed. They decided to call in my OB. She was held up and time started ticking on. I was getting so tired as it was close to midnight and knew how important rest was. I was becoming exhausted.
My OB finally came and decided the balloon catheter was our best route. This made me anxious as I hadn't needed it with my previous induction and I am definitely someone who takes comfort in the familiar. My OB and midwife started prepping to insert it. It freaking hurt. I almost kicked the OB in the head, I kept apologising for my knee jerk reaction, we laughed it off and she tried again. I tried my best to relax and breathe. They were doing their thing and I felt a warm sensation. I thought to myself "they must fill the catheter up with water, thats nice that they warmed it" and then my OB exclaimed "ohhh we have A-R-M.... YOUR WATERS HAVE BROKEN!!" I felt the colour drain from my face... um what? This was not how I saw this going in my head! It's midnight, Adams gone home, I was supposed to nap.... Not anymore! She turned to my midwife and said "This has never happened before" they joked again that at least now they had something to do as I was still the only person in birth suite. We laughed about how normally a crochet hook was needed etc. I thought to myself, "no wonder it hurt so bad!" My OB quickly removed her gloves and they snapped back and flicked waters all over me! My OB didn't realise and kept talking about our options moving forward. My midwife and I started hysterically laughing trying to tell her. When we finally managed to get out the words and told her she was mortified! She was cleaning me up apologising profusely but she reassured me by saying "at least they're your own sterile waters, I'm normally covered in somebody elses!" I was truly blessed with the best midwives and OB's.
I called Adam and messaged my close friends. We decided to wait on the syntocinon drip and see how my body progressed on its own. I stood up and BAM a full on contraction.... I knew from then on I would not need any assistance with labour progressing. We moved into my birthing room and my midwife went to meet Adam out the front of the hospital. I remember standing by myself in the bathroom thinking "What the hell just happened...Holy shit this is it"
My birth plan was epidural and my midwife offered to get the anaesthetist now. I told her to wait as I wanted to experience labour for a bit first and give my body a chance to get going. I did 15 hours drug free with my first and to 9cm with my second drug free so I was pretty confident I could handle it for a while still. Oh how I was wrong. The pain was increasing hard and fast and we decided to get the anaesthetist in sooner rather than later so I could get some rest as I hadn't slept since Wednesday night and we were in the early hours of Friday. She arrived quickly and begun the risk talk. Stopping whilst I had contractions we finally got through all the risks and signed off on it. I sat on the edge of the bed ready and in position when alarms started sounding and everyone ran from my room. Another woman had come in, in labour and her baby needed to be birthed ASAP via emergency c section. I completely understood but was scared as my epidural was no longer happening for at least an hour or so.
A couple of hours went by and the pain continued increasing, nothing like what I had experienced with the girls. Anxiously waiting for the anaesthetist to return I tried the gas and some hypno birthing. By now it 2-3 hours since the emergency c section and I asked where she was. My midwife went to go find out. She came back in and told me "I'm so sorry Alyssa but we've had a trauma come in on the helicopter and she's gone into theatre" WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. WHY did I waste time in the beginning wanting to experience labour??? WHY did I let her stop talking when I was having contractions??? I shook off my negative headspace and started talking myself through it and convinced myself I'd be ok and work with the gas. I wanted to try the bath but when I tried to stand up the pain would get too much. My contractions were on top of each other and all I kept thinking was THANK GOD I DECLINED THE SYNTOCINON DRIP!
Time ticked on and I was waiting patiently for the anaesthetist, by now I was on a first name bases with her and the gas was making me trip out. I promised I'd throw her a party if she'd just hurry up and take away this pain. We heard another helicopter fly in and I knew what that meant. ANOTHER delay. During all of this the baby's heart rate was dropping and taking a while to recover. I had to lay on my left side and not move. To be honest I started to give up and I cried. Finally around 7am she appeared in my room like an angel. I had no break between my contractions so it took her approximately 8 attempts to get the epidural in. The pain was now gone and I was almost at 8/9cm. Not long to go now. We chatted away with midwives and waited patiently. By 8:45am I was 10cm.
This photo sums up my delivery. Medical staff rushing around us.
Showing him off to his big sisters.
Adams first hold, the baby started to cry and Adam soothed him.
This photo melts my heart.
My godson Archie meeting Vance
Vance waving goodbye to his favourite midwives.
I called Adam and messaged my close friends. We decided to wait on the syntocinon drip and see how my body progressed on its own. I stood up and BAM a full on contraction.... I knew from then on I would not need any assistance with labour progressing. We moved into my birthing room and my midwife went to meet Adam out the front of the hospital. I remember standing by myself in the bathroom thinking "What the hell just happened...Holy shit this is it"
My birth plan was epidural and my midwife offered to get the anaesthetist now. I told her to wait as I wanted to experience labour for a bit first and give my body a chance to get going. I did 15 hours drug free with my first and to 9cm with my second drug free so I was pretty confident I could handle it for a while still. Oh how I was wrong. The pain was increasing hard and fast and we decided to get the anaesthetist in sooner rather than later so I could get some rest as I hadn't slept since Wednesday night and we were in the early hours of Friday. She arrived quickly and begun the risk talk. Stopping whilst I had contractions we finally got through all the risks and signed off on it. I sat on the edge of the bed ready and in position when alarms started sounding and everyone ran from my room. Another woman had come in, in labour and her baby needed to be birthed ASAP via emergency c section. I completely understood but was scared as my epidural was no longer happening for at least an hour or so.
A couple of hours went by and the pain continued increasing, nothing like what I had experienced with the girls. Anxiously waiting for the anaesthetist to return I tried the gas and some hypno birthing. By now it 2-3 hours since the emergency c section and I asked where she was. My midwife went to go find out. She came back in and told me "I'm so sorry Alyssa but we've had a trauma come in on the helicopter and she's gone into theatre" WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. WHY did I waste time in the beginning wanting to experience labour??? WHY did I let her stop talking when I was having contractions??? I shook off my negative headspace and started talking myself through it and convinced myself I'd be ok and work with the gas. I wanted to try the bath but when I tried to stand up the pain would get too much. My contractions were on top of each other and all I kept thinking was THANK GOD I DECLINED THE SYNTOCINON DRIP!
Time ticked on and I was waiting patiently for the anaesthetist, by now I was on a first name bases with her and the gas was making me trip out. I promised I'd throw her a party if she'd just hurry up and take away this pain. We heard another helicopter fly in and I knew what that meant. ANOTHER delay. During all of this the baby's heart rate was dropping and taking a while to recover. I had to lay on my left side and not move. To be honest I started to give up and I cried. Finally around 7am she appeared in my room like an angel. I had no break between my contractions so it took her approximately 8 attempts to get the epidural in. The pain was now gone and I was almost at 8/9cm. Not long to go now. We chatted away with midwives and waited patiently. By 8:45am I was 10cm.
We decided to wait and let him descend naturally and calmly. Bek joined us and it was almost go time. The midwife came in and wasn't happy with my monitoring. My contractions started to get further apart and his heart rate was dropping more frequently and taking even longer to recover. My midwives asked for Adam to push the button on the wall to call for more assistance. They were on the phone to my OB and I could tell things were taking a turn. My midwives faces were riddled with worry and one stood with her hand hovered over the red emergency button. My OB rushed in and by now my contractions had completely stopped. I looked around the room and it had somehow filled with medical staff. My OB explained contractions very rarely just stop especially for a third child. He said we needed to use forceps to deliver as soon as possible, that I needed an Episiotomy and I had to push without contractions. I refused the Episiotomy and pushed with all I had and finally he started to make an appearance. The midwife grabbed my hand and placed it on vance's head. It was such an amazing experience - something I had declined with the girls. I am so grateful to have experienced it this time. Once his head was out the Dr told me to stop pushing as he was wrapped in the cord, it was around his neck, shoulder and arm. Once the cord was removed I was able to push again and at 11:32am the most beautiful baby boy I had ever seen was placed in my arms.
Vance James Paul Cotter
Born 14th December 11:32am,
3040 grams, 48 cm.
My sweet boy
Facetime with my mum
This photo melts my heart.
We enjoyed an hour or so of skin to skin when my midwife noticed Vance was shuddering, they decided to call the paediatrician back in and test his blood sugars. They were 1.5 which is extremely low. Vance was rushed to special care with Adam and I was left in the room. Determined to join them I somehow made my legs work, showered and made my way to special care. I was not prepared to walk in and see my baby with tubes down his nose, being fed sugar gel in his mouth and them over filling him formula. I was so shocked I burst into tears. We had quite the journey over the next few days with Vance having unexplained 'hypo's' I sometimes only got 15 minutes sleep between feeds and finally after 4 days we got 24 hours of stable blood sugars and were allowed to go home. The Dr's believe it was due to the foetal distress in labour as I had no risk factors. I am so grateful he is OK and I have no idea how parents cope with high needs children in special care.
I am so grateful for my mum who was able to entertain the girls and cook for everyone each night and Bek for capturing our amazing photos. Even though she was up for 5 days she barely saw us. Having Adam by my side for the countless hours we spent in special care was all made possible thanks to these two ladies.
Overall nothing went to plan and I'd sum my labour up as my worst! However meeting him was one of the best moments of my life and I would do it all over again. I am so blessed he chose me to be his mama and I cherish every day with him.
Comments
Post a Comment